And the day came when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
– Anaïs Nin
Rachel Zamore, Relationship Consultant
Experienced, compassionate, unbiased expertise for couples at the crossroads
Hi, I’m Rachel, and I specialize in helping people connect with the best in themselves to create relationships and lives that are nourishing, connected and congruent.
I help couples in crisis figure out how to get unstuck and start moving things forward in a new way, whether that is together in a phoenix-rising-restart-of-your-marriage kind of way, or on your own separate paths forward; and I help individuals develop their relationship IQ and shift old patterns to create the relationships they desire and that are true to their deepest self.
I love helping people come back to the best in themselves to make thoughtful, self-reflective decisions about their next best steps, from a place of understanding, wisdom and clarity. My approach is proactive, empowering, structured and kind. Clients have said they really appreciate the blend of heart and head I bring to my work, as well as my ability to see the big picture and help illuminate the hidden logic in whatever may be going on currently or historically.
One of the things I find so satisfying about my work is witnessing people shifting from a state of overwhelm to ease, and from confusion to clarity. Whatever path couples choose in the discernment process, the outcomes tend to be more amicable and peaceful for those choosing divorce, and for those that choose to try to heal their relationship, they have an tremendous jump-start on the work ahead, and the confidence that both people are truly on board for the process. In all, the growth that takes place in the private retreats is profound for many people, and — whatever the outcome — that is a good thing for all of the children and families involved.
As one family law judge said, “On the superhighway to divorce, there are no rest stops and no exit ramps.” The discernment process slows things down so that couples can be sure they’re on the right path, with a thoughtful decision made with care and intention. Ending a marriage is too important to have that decision made from a place of reactivity or overwhelm. Sometimes there are times to end a marriage, and the discernment process helps couples make sure they’re not making that decision prematurely or even unnecessarily (as in cases where both people want to try to reconcile and build something stronger together, but they were too hurt to be vulnerable enough to admit it). The one-on-one format creates the safety for people to be really honest with themselves in a way that would be too hard with the partner in the room, and I’m incredibly grateful to my mentor, Dr. Bill Doherty, for gifting me and the world with this brilliant model.
Helping people with having authentic and nourishing relationships has been a passion of mine for a long time, and my work as a relationship consultant — though not therapy itself — is deeply informed by my background as a couples therapist and an integrative (body-mind) individual therapist. In addition to being certified in Discernment Counseling and Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (considered by many the “gold standard” of couples therapy) my work is also influenced by extensive training in integrative healing approaches including Internal Family Systems, Hakomi and Sensorimotor Psychotherapy. I have a BA in Public Policy from Brown University, and a graduate degree in Psychology from the California Institute of Integral Studies.
I look forward to hearing from you and exploring the possibility of working together.
What Others Are Saying…
Rachel Zamore is one of the very best discernment counselors in the United States. I would send loved ones to her if their marriage was on the brink.
I truly can’t offer enough recommendation for Rachel Zamore. We were living a nightmare and had no idea how were we to climb out of the pit we were in and rebuild our life together.
I am eternally grateful in how Rachel taught/encouraged/counseled my husband and I to meet each other as if for the first time, all over again. In fact, I’d say she helped us meet our inner selves as well, and bring our true selves to the table. Counseling with Rachel was worth every dollar we wisely spent reaping the benefits of her years of knowledge and the gift of her abilities.
We just celebrated our 28th anniversary and look forward to many more years together celebrating with our children and future grandchildren, together!
Choosing to stay in your marriage or not is not an easy decision. Rachel helped us understand the root cause of our issues and was an amazing facilitator as we decided what was best for us. She will help you realize details about yourself and your relationship so you can make a choice with understanding and peace. We both wish we found Rachel years ago.
I want to thank you for helping us through this very difficult time in our marriage. This was probably the hardest thing that I have done so far in my life but your wonderful guidance throughout the discernment process was what got me through it.
Rachel provides grounded, practical support and space for deep transformation. The work felt very spiritual to me and had immediate effects on my day to day life. I now feel greater ease, connection and strength in myself.
Schedule an initial discovery call to explore the possibility of working together. I look forward to talking with you soon!